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S DA FOUNTAIN Odyssey archive · est. 2000
Episodes 689 of 1,068
0669 16 Oct 2010 28 min

Wooton's Broken Pencil Show

Connie's car alarm is blaring, her purse is locked in the car, and her Kids' Radio show about whether entertainment needs a point has just been handed to Wooton - who has no plan at all. While Connie waits for rescue, Wooton fills the airwaves with squirrel accusations, a ridiculous car-alarm commercial, and a made-up hero called Captain Absolutely, defender of truth and justice. The villainous Thug Clockripper schemes to pop a giant balloon over Metropolitanville and release a gas that makes everyone laugh until nothing means anything. Meanwhile Eugene explains how an alarm system points to a Designer... and turns out to have had Connie's missing keys in his pocket the whole time. Captain Absolutely catches the flying pencil and hurls balloon and all into space, Eugene apologizes, and Connie forgives him and takes back her show. Wooton signs off leaving everyone to wonder whether his perfectly pointless program had a point after all.
Found on Cause and Effect Album 52 · 12 episodes

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The story

Read the full synopsis 2 min

Connie begins a Kids' Radio discussion about whether entertainment should always have a point. When her car alarm starts sounding outside, she leaves Wooton in charge while she searches for her keys. Wooton fills the silence with a call about whether a squirrel has been unfairly blamed for the alarm.

Connie discovers that her purse is locked inside the car and must wait for help. Wooton begins improvising a program about car alarms, complete with a ridiculous advertisement. Eugene wanders into the temporary studio and explains how alarm systems resemble the human body's ability to detect an intrusion. Just as a car points to a designer, he says, the intricate unity of the body points to its Creator.

Whit joins them, and a caller returns to Connie's original question. Whit and Eugene believe entertainment should have meaning, because people naturally look for purpose and ultimately find it in God. Wooton responds by creating an adventure about Captain Absolutely, hero of truth and justice.

The villainous wrestling manager Thug Clockripper captures Captain Absolutely with the help of the powerful Roundhouse. Thug wants to make everything round, eliminate every point, and reduce life to meaningless fun so his failing wrestling network will regain viewers. His plan is to puncture a giant balloon above Metropolitanville and release a gas that will make everyone laugh until they no longer care about meaning.

Meanwhile, Red Hollard arrives to open Connie's car. Instead of using locksmith tools, he appears to smash a window with a brick, though the destruction is only a radio sound effect. Connie then discovers that her keys are not in the purse after all. Eugene has had them since retrieving a box from her trunk earlier in the day.

Back in Metropolitanville, Captain Absolutely escapes the Roundhouse by tickling his weak spot. He catches the flying pencil before it punctures the balloon, ties balloon and projectile together, and sends both into space. Thug and the Roundhouse escape, promising to return with another scheme.

Connie confronts Eugene about the keys, and he apologizes for the misunderstanding. Whit and Wooton turn even their disagreement into on-air commentary about resolving conflict. Connie accepts the apology and reclaims her program. After all the silliness, Wooton declares that the point is never to steal a car in 1896 - leaving everyone to decide whether his seemingly pointless show has made a point after all.

Around the story

The host segments that opened and closed the broadcast.
Closing

Chris observes that only Wooton could have created a show that made a point of having no point, and she asks listeners whether it had a point without trying to make one, inviting them to write in with their answer. Before she can finish giving the address, Wooton himself suddenly appears, saying the police have called because an alarm is going off at her house. Chris guesses it was her cat, who has set it off before, and rushes out, handing the microphone to Wooton. Left alone, Wooton reads the closing announcements himself, gets confused when he reaches his own name in the cast list, and accidentally introduces himself as Chris - leaving him to wonder if he is having an identity crisis.