Icky and Kat and Balty and Bones

At the Festival of American Folk Tales, held at an apple farm outside Odyssey, Pastor Wilson Knox and John Avery Whittaker gather listeners around a campfire to share their own musical version of one of America's most famous stories: the Legend of Sleepy Hollow. They call their retelling "Icky and Kat and Balty and Bones," and it begins with the legend the people of Sleepy Hollow love best - the tale of a headless Hessian soldier who rides through the night on a horse called Old Big Red, forever searching for the head he lost to a cannonball.

Into this superstitious little town comes Ichabod Crane, or "Icky," a lanky, endlessly hungry schoolmaster from Connecticut. Icky quickly discovers that the townspeople will believe almost anything, so he uses his knowledge of superstitions to convince everyone that he is a learned man - one who, conveniently, must be paid in tea, scones, berry tarts, and peaches drowned in cream. Hoping to live in comfort forever, Icky sets out to marry Katrina "Kat" Van Tassel, daughter of Balthus "Balty" Van Tassel, the wealthiest farmer in the area. Over plate after plate of cheese Danish, Icky flatters Balty, frightens him with talk of sinister spirits, and gets himself named a suitor for Kat's hand.

But Kat has overheard the whole conversation, and she is horrified. She tells her father that the schoolmaster looks like a scarecrow and teaches nothing but superstition, but Balty only urges her to "be sensible" and insists that he will choose her husband. So Kat rides off to her true love, Brom Van Pelt, called Bones - a young man as strong as an ox and, unfortunately, about as bright. Kat realizes it is Icky's mind that must be changed, not her father's, though coming up with a plan proves difficult for Bones, who admits, "Thinking is hard." At last he hits on an idea: he is the town's self-proclaimed "prankster gangster," and he will prank Icky right out of Sleepy Hollow. Bones unleashes rats, smoke, a barking dog, and more, but Icky shrugs it all off, declaring that only the supernatural is truly to be feared.

When Bones confronts the schoolmaster directly, Icky spots Balty approaching and seizes his chance. He cries out that Bones is cursed and has given him the evil eye. Balty, furious, banishes Bones from his daughter's company and announces on the spot that Kat will marry Ichabod Crane. He even throws a betrothal party at his farm - inviting everyone except Bones.

At the party, a miserable Kat meets Icky alone and begs him to break off the engagement, confessing that her heart belongs to Bones. Icky coldly refuses. He admits he cares nothing for her love; she will be his wife, and one day he will run the whole estate, since her father isn't getting any younger. If Balty backs out, Icky threatens, he will call down curses on the house and take legal action too. Nothing short of the Headless Horseman himself, he boasts, could stop the marriage. Kat runs off crying - but their conversation has not been private. Someone has been listening.

Late that night, Icky rides home alone on his sorry old horse, trying not to think about the legend as midnight draws near. Suddenly a huge dark figure looms out of the gloom, seated on a big red horse and missing its head, singing an ominous warning: "Don't lose your head." Icky flees in terror, racing for the church bridge where the legend says the specter must vanish. But just before he reaches it, the horseman appears in front of him - and Ichabod Crane is never seen in Sleepy Hollow again. The next day the search party finds only hoofprints, his frightened horse, and his hat. A few silly folks believe the Hessian's ghost carried him off, but the smarter people know exactly who the Headless Horseman really was: Bones, the prankster gangster.

Bones is thoroughly pleased with himself - until Kat finds out. Instead of being grateful, she is heartbroken that he would treat even Icky so cruelly. Telling him, "I won't trade one manipulator for another one," she bids Bones goodbye, leaving him alone with his prank and his regrets.

Back at the campfire, Whit explains that Washington Irving's original tale didn't end this way, but they changed it to make the lesson plain: superstitions may seem amusing, but believing in them leads to wrecked lives and broken hearts. Instead of trusting silly legends, it's always best to put your faith in the Lord - something that, as Pastor Knox observes, would have made Ichabod Crane a whole lot less icky.